Season Finale

Tomorrow is the final race in the 2010 Winter Short Track Series of misfortune, and I have mixed feelings about it. First and foremost, I’m happy to be able to get out and race again, even though it’s been filled with suckitude (for me anyways.) What I haven’t enjoyed is the hours I’ve spent washing the mud out of my clothes, cleaning and maintaining my bike, and the realization that neither I nor the Greatest Short Track Bike on Earth has been ready for this grueling series.


I fully suspected that I wouldn’t be in “racing shape” so early in the season. I didn’t really prepare very well in the “offseason” either, other than I drank a lot of beer. Also, I had a feeling that the P.O.S. I threw together at the last minute and called a bike would disappoint me. Yes my friends, the Greatest Short Tack Bike on Earth was a failed experiment, but I will press on. I do have some hope that The Big O will have much better results though. Of course, I thought that the Greatest Piece of Shit on Earth would fare much better than it did, but hey, at least I learned a lesson. You can build a bike two ways: right, and right now. I chose the latter and paid dearly for it.


Although I somehow doubt it, the weather gurus around here are predicting some sunny goodness for this weekend, although it will still most likely be cold. We had a little rain earlier in the week, but it has been dry so far. Maybe the trail will dry out and be in nice shape for the season finale. I’m not sure if I can handle myself out there with no mud. It will be fun either way I guess. I may do what I did last week and bring both bikes, deciding at the last possible moment which one to ride. I worked on both of them last night to get them back into riding condition, so I shouldn’t have any issues. I checked and double-checked the drivetrain, brakes, and everything else I could think of. I even gave Goose a hug to make him feel better.


Looking forward, there are a few things on the horizon. The month of March is relatively event-free, so maybe I can get some quality saddle time without the demands of a race bearing down on me. If the weather warms up a bit, we’ll resume the regularly-scheduled Tarheel Trailblazers Kids Ride. I miss those, and I’m sure the kids do too. Other than that, I’ll be pulling stuff out of my ass to put here on the blog the next few weeks. Hang in there, as things could get real messy around here. See y’all Monday.

The Big “O”-nnouncement

So, you came here today to find out what the big deal was. I got some new stuff, right? Big deal, everyone gets new stuff. Hell, I cleaned up at Christmas. What more could I want? I’m glad you asked. Well, I asked for you, but whatever. Wait, am I talking to myself here? Probably so.


Well, I finally gave in to the constant peer pressure from my shop, my friends, and some anonymous (to me) people out on the Internets. Since the Greatest Short Track on Earth was such an epic fail, I am giving big wheels a try. Not a Big Wheel, but a 29er bicycle. An anonymous commenter guessed yesterday that I got a 29er singlepeed, and I flat-out denied it. I only denied it because he or she was only half right. I love having gears too much to go with the singlespeed thing. I imagine I’ll give into that one some day too. I’m a sucker for punishment, and singlespeeders seem to be all about that.


So, what the hell did I get anyway? Anyone who’s been around here for a while knows how much I love I have for Diamondback Bicycles, so you can probably guess that my foray into 29 inch wheeled bikes would include them. Well, you would be correct. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the Big O, or my new Diamondback Overdrive frame.



(Cat tree not included.)




I didn’t just grab this frame because it’s a Diamondback, mind you. While that had a lot to do with it, there are a few more reasons to it than that. First, I got a hell of a deal on the frame. I couldn’t pass it up, no matter how hard I tried. Second, who wouldn’t fall in love with these sexy curves?



Okay, maybe that’s not such a good reason to start riding 29ers. However, this next tidbit of information was good enough for me. Are you aware that back in 1992, Diamondback Bicycles was one of the very first companies to roll out a big-wheeled bike, also called the Overdrive? Yes, they get zero points for name originality. While it took off like a lead ballon back then, they were able to resurrect it two years ago and get with the times. The Overdrive would probably be considered an “entry-level” 29er, and that’s okay with me since I would be considered an “entry-level” 29er rider. A match made in heaven.


Also, there have been plenty of good reviews for this bike, even from “respectable” people.

Here is one from Guitar Ted.

And the follow-up.

Here is one from Bicycling magazine.

This is from some random website I pulled out of my ass (and coincidentally was “borrowed” from Guitar Ted’s website.


One thing stuck out in the last review: The Overdrive Pro represented a new class of 29″er: The “Under Grand Group.” I guess that means you don’t have to spend a ton of money to ride a big-wheeled bike. I’m all about that one. Besides, this is yet another experiment for me, and I hope it doesn’t end in failure like the Greatest Short Track Bike on Earth. Only time will tell.


Since I only have a frame in my possession, I’ll be building this one up from scratch. Sure, I’ll reuse some of the not shitty parts from The Greatest Short Track Bike on Earth, but I am still in need of some 29er-specific parts, such as a fork and wheels. I may go a little cheap on those at first, since I have no idea if I will like riding on clown wheels. Also, I have some upgraded parts (that I felt weren’t good enough for my current P.O.S. hardtail) on standby. There will be no shitty v-brake action on the 29er either, since I have a nice set of hydros for it. What a relief that will be.


So, what will it look like when it’s done? I don’t know for sure, but here is what it would look like if you purchased it from the shop, so you have some kind of idea:


Image "borrowed" from Diamondback's display at Interbike.

Hopefully when I build it, it won’t have such shitty parts, although it is a possibility. The only thing I may skimp on for now would be the fork, but I am looking for a helluva deal somewhere. Also, this thing won’t be built overnight. I plan on taking my time to find the right stuff to put on it, so I will keep everyone updated as I go along. While I realize that it won’t make me any faster, it looks like it could be fun. One thing for sure, it will have gears and a squishy fork…for now.

What’s in the Box?

Okay, so I already told you that the Big Brown Truck dropped off something at the infamous B-43 Worldwide Headquarters da udda day. What are the contents of said box? Well, I’m still not telling; at least not yet. Although I’ve already opened the box and revealed the contents to the folks who reside at the B-43 World Headquarters, no one else knows. Well, I may have spilled the beans to the other members of the B-43 team too. I can’t remember if I told them or not. Whatever. So what you say, TheMutt has some big announcement, right? Well, it may or may not be that important, but it’s driving me nutty. I’m sure I’m driving you all nutty also by delaying the unveiling of this new item. Is it a new wheelset? A new fork? New shifters, brakes, etc.? Did Cane Creek Cycling Components send me another care package? Is there a new sponsor that’s sending goodies? Not likely, but one could only guess at this point. Hell, it might be one of these:


With this, I would be guaranteed to mow down the competition.


All kidding aside, it’s not a lawnmower bike. I know, you’re extremely disappointed. While I have a new “something” in the works, I’m still wondering why the hell I’ve even done such a thing. Have I mentioned that all of this crazy weather is making me insane? It could be worse I guess.


Speaking of crazy weather, here is the latest video from my pal Bart at Southpark Cycles. The latest round of snow-turned-to-mud was hell on our race series, but it has kept it interesting. While I am not anywhere near where I need to be as far as racing shape, I am glad to have the opportunity to ride in such horrible conditions. We don’t normally get to ride on a trail when the weather is like this. Anyway, here is the video:



That’s all I have for today. Perhaps I can actually tell you what I’ve been hinting around about on tomorrow’s post. I just might do that.

How Do You Prepare?

Last Friday night, we here at the B-43 Worldwide headquarters were preparing to be snowed in again. Since the wise weather forecasters in our area initially said we wouldn’t get any snow, I started to think we would get blasted with the stuff. While we ended up getting a fair amount, we were most definitely not snowed in. Normal Fridays around here consist of pizza and a movie, and this past one was no exception. I decided to start the evening by digging in the beer reserves.



I “discovered” this little beauty at our local grocery chain, so I decided to pick it up. The fine folks at New Belgium Brewing came up with a new Pale Ale, and I was eager to try it. I am already a fan of their Fat Tire beer, so I knew I would like it. It was very good, with the perfect amount of hops (for all you hoppy lovers out there.) I couldn’t stop there though. I found yet another new brew to try:



This one is from the good people at Sweetwater Brewing Company, just down the road in Atlanta, Georgia. I have been a fan of their stuff for a while now, so I figured that this particular brew would be added to my list of favorites. However, I didn’t read the bottle too carefully. While I noticed that it had 9% alcohol (yay!), I must have missed that part where it said “stout.” I poured it in my mug and this is what I saw:



It looked like a glass of motor oil. While I don’t usually drink too many stouts, this one looked appealing. It had a nice aroma, and a bit of a bite to it. It was pretty good, but I wouldn’t recommend drinking more than one at a time.


After getting those two beverages in me and enjoying the quiet snowfall for a bit, it was time to get down to the pizza. We usually order it, but this time we decided to make our own. After gathering a wacky list of ingredients, we were ready. We each made our own, plus a “regular” one for the three of us. I started on mine.

Nothing unusual here, just a crust:



Next step (of course) was the sauce:



After adding some cheese, I whipped out the pepperoni. Since I don’t eat filthy swine, this pepperoni is made from turkey. While arranging them on the pizza, I decided to pay homage to the everlasting coincidence number:



Lunchbox and Little Miss Sunshine were busy too. Here we have a pie designed by the Lunchbox, complete with stuff you wouldn’t normally put on a pizza:


Yep, it has those little Goldfish crackers, Oreos, and tater-tots. Yummy.


Little Miss Sunshine went with a little healthier (and less gross) pizza. I call it “Vegetable Surprise.” It smelled really great coming out of the oven too:



We enjoyed our pizzas, and everyone was happy with the results. Why is the blog all about pizza today, you ask? Well, since my “season” is off to such a shitty start, I thought I would elaborate on my not-so normal race preparations. That could explain why I haven’t done so well in the 2010 Winter Short Track Series so far, but I don’t care. You all should know by now that I don’t take this shit too seriously. Sure, I need to ride my bike to stay sane, but that doesn’t mean I can’t have fun. I’m sure I’ll crank up the intensity as the year goes on. For now though, it’s beer and weird pizza.


Don’t worry folks, I haven’t forgotten about the “announcement” I promised last week. I haven’t decided what the hell I’m doing yet. Go figure. A box from the Big Brown Truck has arrived, and I am in a state of confusion over its contents. I wonder if I have made a mistake. I’ll tell y’all about it in due time, and hopefully get some opinions. Maybe I’ll get around to it sometime this week.

Godzilla vs. Pelican Penis Man

I'm not too sure what all the fuss is about up there in the Great White North. You guys should expect cold weather. But I reckon being couped up in a meat locker could have its effect on one's psyche. It's been cold down here for a couple of weeks and I've about had it. Not so much with the ice on the windshield every morning but it's makin' some people do some flat out weird things. ---5:30 am 27 degrees on Disney property and yes it did snow.

Snow (Race) Day

I mentioned on Thursday that we would have a break in the weather for race four of the 2010 Winter Short Track Series this past weekend. Like most of our local weather forecasters, I was wrong. There was a winter storm approaching, but we weren’t supposed to see anything from it. It was first projected to miss us completely. By the time I got home on Friday though, it had started snowing.



So much for a not-so-muddy race, huh? As the snow continued to fall throughout the night, I wondered if the roads would be covered enough to warrant another cancelled race. I didn’t sleep worth a damn that night either, since I kept waking up to check if the race was still on. I wasn’t hoping for a cancellation, but I wanted to know if I could even get out of my neighborhood to go to the race venue. When I finally woke up for good Saturday morning, the Tarheel Trailblazers site said that the race was on. Race promoter extraordinaire Neal Boyd posted up the question, “Who wants to race in the snow?” I loaded up both of my trail bikes and got ready to head out.



The drive to get out of my neighborhood was a little rough at first, but the interstates were clear.



When I arrived at the trail, they were still setting up the course. The parking lot was covered in ice, but since the sun was coming out, it was melting pretty quickly.



My normal race-day photographer, Lunchbox, decided to skip Saturday’s race to have a little fun in the snow with his friends back in our neighborhood. Since he’s still a kid, I didn’t blame him at all. I later learned that Little Miss Sunshine participated in the snow-fun as well, even making a snowman. Looking back, I probably should have stayed home to play in the snow too. This past weekend’s race was hell. Not so much on me, but moreso on my bike.


As you saw in the above photos, I brought both bikes. Since the trail was covered in snow for the most part, I opted to ride Goose, since it was better equipped. The dual suspension and the knobbier Kenda Nevegals seemed like a good choice. Also, I figured that having hydraulic disc brakes would have a lesser chance of failure than the shitty V-brake action on the Greatest Short Track Bike on Earth. I took two warm-up laps to get reacquainted with my long lost friend. As usual, I didn’t make the best choice, but I was committed to staying with the full squish bike.


When the race started, I took it pretty easy. No one really took off that fast anyway, and my goal was to just ride. The trail had a bit of ice, and some of the snow had already started to melt, turning the trail to the ever-so-familiar muddy brown mess I had grown accustomed to riding. I stayed with the pack on the first lap, even keeping the leaders in sight. Fatigue was not an issue as it normally was, and I credit that to the thorough warm-up. I kept pushing to stay with the group, and we completed lap number one.


Lap two was a different story. I decided to make my move, and push a little harder to move up a few places. After the first set of berms/downhill stuff, I stood up to “put the hammer down”, so to speak. As soon as I did, my chain locked up. By this point, my bike was covered in mud and snow, which meant that the drivetrain was getting gunked-up. I thought that it was a freak occurrence, since I’ve raced in these shitty conditions before. While Goose is a highly-tuned machine, it was not used to being ridden in such a muddy hell. I continued to have problems on every climb, as it only got worse. After lap two I could still see the pack, but I was fading away fast.


On a positive note, I didn’t really feel that tired. I had plenty of energy, but the bike was preventing me from putting that energy to good use. In spite of my mechanical issues, I managed to stay in good spirits. While I rode the trail, I found myself in awe of the fact that I was actually racing in the snow. Being a Florida native, this is something I never even thought I would be doing. Ever. As the race went on though, my drivetrain issues became worse, along with my attitude. I was getting really pissed at the fact that my bike was hindering my progress. Why oh why didn’t I ride the shitty bike I built for this race series? I asked myself that question every time my chain locked up (which became more frequent as the race went on.)


After the last guy in my class went by me, I concentrated on staying in the race. I would not quit, no matter what happened. I continued to ride along, thinking that my chain would break at any given moment. If it did, I would stay in the race; even if I had to run along side my bike to get in the last few laps. I tried not to think about it, even though it made the most horrible sound every time it locked up. Chainsuck, well, sucks.


After what seemed like an eternity, I heard my favorite words, “One lap to go!” I knew I just had to survive one more lap of hell. I took the downhills with reckless abandon, and hit the final climb with all my might. At this point, I didn’t care what happened to the bike. If something broke, so be it. All I wanted to do was finish. I crossed the finish line in 12th place, which doesn’t sound too bad. It was bad though, since only twelve racers showed up. This would go down as my worst performance ever, even though physically I felt fine. I know mechanical issues affect every racer at some point in time, but this one really pissed me off. I take good care of my bikes, but I guess that wasn’t enough this time. I have to say that Little Miss Sunshine warned me about this though. She said that Goose wouldn’t be happy racing in such horrible conditions. Lesson learned (again.)


Even though my race sucked, I found some enjoyment in watching others out there. A lot of people were having issues, from chainsuck to lack of brakes, so that gave me a little comfort. The trail became even muddier as the day went on, so it was starting to look like I had it easy.


Here we have the MadSS fighting through the muck in his race:



Local bike shop owner Bart was enjoying the muddy goodness too. I can’t wait to see the helmet camera footage.



Local team rider Eric attempts to navigate the slippery bridge.



We did have a little fun out there on the trail during some of the later races. A group of guys had made a little snowman, and everyone paid homage to it as they passed by. It moved along to various points on the trail during the singlespeed race for the racers’ (and our) enjoyment.



The little snowman was perched on a rock at the rock garden to get a better view of the race (and to heckle the participants.) He would eventually meet his demise there though, since he jumped onto the trail a few minutes later. Two riders eventually ended his little snowy life. Rest in Peace little guy. You will be missed.



As you can see, Saturday’s race was a roller coaster of emotions. The little snowman’s demise was sad, but he did provide some entertainment that took my mind off of my shitty race performance. Hopefully next week will be dry and free of mechanical issues. This muddy, snowy shit really sucks, at least for racing. I sure can’t wait for Spring to get here.