Fun Friday (Christmas Edition)

Yup, another “Fun Friday.”  With Christmas coming up next week, I figured I should “get into the spirit” so to speak.  The best way I can think of is with some Star Wars stuff.

Since I promised Lunchbox I would keep using the gifs he sends me, I'll give y'all one of those too.

I know, I know.  That has nothing to do with Christmas.  Well then, here's a video that does.

And since I'm in such a giving mood, do you need something to do while you're bored at work today?  Watch this piece of crap that should have never been made.

Don't worry, it's been cut down to only fifteen minutes (instead of over and hour and a half of crap.)

You watched it all, didn't you?  Yuck.

See y'all Monday.

Busy With Other Stuff

Sorry about not being here yesterday.  I usually let y'all know if I’m taking a day off, but I didn’t really have a chance.  I had to leave for work a little earlier, and when I got there I was kinda busy.

You know, working.

What a mess.  I do like my job though (most of the time.)  Anyway, other than work, I finally got out for another ride on Tuesday and it was fun as usual.  Social pace, minimal mileage, and a few beers made for a good night.  Ah yes, beer.  I had plenty of choices too.

I like beer.  You know this.

It’s still not all about me though.  Since I’m the “bike guy” in my neighborhood,  a guy up the street asked if I could put together some bikes he bought for his kids for Christmas.  He offered to pay me in beer so of course I said yes.

So they’re not really bikes per se, since they came from a local big box store, but they have wheels, pedals, and all that stuff so it’s close enough.  I’m just happy that I’ll see a few more kids riding in the neighborhood.  Even though those bikes are more like toys it’s a start.

We all have to start somewhere.

This time of year is about doing stuff for others so I hear, and I was happy to do my neighbor a solid.  I have some more thoughts on the “holidays”, but I’ll save that for another time.  I have to get to work so I can go for a ride later.

So yeah, now it’s all about me again.

Early Christmas

Every year around November, I get put on a buying hiatus.  I can’t purchase any presents for myself because Christmas is coming and it’s really hard for others to get me "things I want."  It's hard though, because I like to get my own shit.  I obey for the most part, but what do I do if I really need something? 

It might be kinda hard to see in the photo, but the rails are bent on my saddle.  This isn’t the first time that’s happened so I won’t blame it on the holidays.  It’s actually been like that for a month now, and it’s off just enough that I can feel it when I ride.

So, I got a new one.

Yeah, I know.  Replace the one you broke with the same model?  Well, yeah.  I like those saddles.  In fact, it’s the only saddle that feels good on my bony ass.  I’ve been through a few over the years, but not enough to even think about switching to another brand.

What can I say?  I’m loyal.  So shut up.

In other news, it looks like I’ll get to ride twice in the same week.  Our weekly social ride is tonight, and if I’m lucky I’ll get out of work early enough to get in a lap before the group gets there.  This time of year it’s important to ride (for me, anyway) so I’ll take whatever I can get.

Short post today.  So what.  You’ve probably got Christmas shopping to do and all that.

Out On My Own

Last week I talked about not riding and getting fat, and this weekend it looked like I might head down that path never to return. The weather on Saturday sucked, so I just had to do something on Sunday. The problem?


I didn't want to.


I woke up feeling tired and lazy, and almost talked myself out of riding because everything around here was closed. Somehow I managed to grab my bike and got my ass out the door to go ride. Making breakfast to go probably helped.

My destination was Uwharrie again, knowing that the conditions there would be good despite the fact that it rained the day before. I mean, it's pretty rocky out there so it drains well.

I was all alone despite the fact that there were quite a few cars in the parking lot. I needed some alone time, so hoped I wouldn't run into any of the people that drove them. I got my wish, and had the place to myself for most of my ride.


It was damn awesome.

I had pretty much all day to ride. Wanting to get in some good mileage, I took off down a fire road in the forest.

I climbed all the way to the top.  The view was nice.

I found some new routes out there, and I can't wait to go back to do some more “exploring.” With over 50,000 acres in the Uwharrie National Forest, there are plenty of places to ride without hitting the same old stuff. The trails are in the best shape I've ever seen, and that's no doubt thanks to the very few people that take time to maintain them. I moved a few fallen trees off the trail during my ride, but for once I'm not talking about myself.

Big thanks to Chris G. for taking time before his ride yesterday to blow the leaves off of one of the trails out there.



So yeah, finally I got out for a ride. It was good to be out there all by my lonesome too. I guess I needed some “me” time.

Fun Friday

Last week I told you I was trying something new on Fridays, so here we go again. Fun Friday was the best I could come up with so you’re stuck with it for a while. With the weekend upon us, I could use a little fun. I’ve had a long, shitty week at work doing “work stuff.”

That’s my real job; installing and maintaining telephone systems. I won’t bore you with the details except to say that I’m gonna be working on this for quite a while. So yeah, I need to relax a little.


Maybe we should get into the Christmas spirit first:









And just for poops and hahas, here’s another one of those weirdo gifs that Lunchbox sent me:

Yeah. Keep watching that. I’m outta here.

If I’m Not Careful…

I’m gonna get fat.

A few years ago, my “offseason” meant plenty of eating and drinking with a little riding thrown in.  While my normal weight is 225 pounds, it would be uncommon for me to shoot up to 235 pounds by the time January rolled around (two years ago I got all the way up to 245.)  Last year, I rode a lot more and kept myself right at my in-season weight of 225.  I figured out that it was pretty easy to do, so I decided that from now on I would stick to it and not put on my traditional offseason flab.  This year it’s not looking so good though.

The weather around here has been extra shitty lately, which means that my riding has been reduced dramatically.  As a matter of fact, I haven’t been on my bike in almost two weeks.  I can blame some of it on the rain, some on the cold, and some on working late, but mostly it’s because I’ve been pretty lazy.

Plus I’ve been eating a lot more for some reason.

It’s been good stuff though, like these deep fried Oreos with ice cream:

And the jar of M&Ms I keep next to me in the living room:

And to top it off my cousin just sent me a giant box of steak:

You know, shit like that.  Couple that with not riding enough lately and I bet I can break my offseason record of 245.  I know it could happen, so that’s exactly why I’m not gonna let it.  You see, unlike most people that allow themselves to get all big and chunky, I’m too disgusted by shit like that to allow myself to fall prey to it.  I don’t want to be a big tubby sumbitch, which means I’m gonna get off my ass and do something about it. 

I’m sure that some people just give up and buy bigger clothes when they start packing on the pounds.  Don’t do it.  Don’t be weak.  Don’t be lazy.  And definitely don’t be a Lardassian.  I’m smart enough to realize where not riding and eating more can lead, and I won’t give in.  I’ll ride in the cold, rain, tornadoes, whatever.  A couple of extra pounds around the holidays is normal (so people say), but forget normal. 

Being a big ‘un is a choice, and I’m choosing to keep it from happening.  With more shitty weather allegedly on the way for this weekend, I’ll get my ass out in it if I have to.  It’s not just about the weight, because riding keeps me sane and happy.  And I’m one grumpy, depressed motherfucker right now. 

And you thought fat people were jolly.

I Don’t Care That Much

I meant to do this sooner, but whatever.

You’ve heard all the stuff about that certain big bike company suing the little guy, right?

You know, this story that made giant headlines in the bike world:

Specialized pressures Canadian bike shop to change name

If you didn’t bother to read it, Dicky had a pretty good post about it yesterday.  I didn’t get involved with all the bashing on The Internets, because frankly I don’t really care either way. Sure, it’s douchey to sue a small bike shop over a name that’s used in other places (and maybe even more douchey to sue a war vet.)  Okay, I’m a veteran so maybe I kinda sorta care about that.  I don’t really give two shits about Specialized, even though my local shop sells them.  Not bashing them, I just don’t give two shits. 

I do however, give two shits about being entertained.  And this mess has been very entertaining so far.  Other than all of the comments and posts on The Internets, two of my favorites were these photos I found:

There’s nothing better than an Internet Shitstorm, and this one didn’t disappoint.  The good news?  This one seems to have a happy ending.

Not that kind of happy ending, but you get the point.

It was fun to bash (or enjoy others bashing) the big guy for a while.  And since everyone else weighed in about it, I felt like I sorta had an obligation to as well. 

Stupid blog.  Making me fell obligated.

Now, I’m gonna go find something else to entertain me.