Should've Been Horrible

Picking up from where I left off yesterday...

I sorta had a plan.  I've been on some of those gravel roads in Uwharrie before, but that was after wearing myself out on singletrack first.  I never went as far as I wanted to go but I knew that there would be a little bit of climbing as I headed north past the "normal" trails.

I thought about riding some singletrack, but decided against it.  "I'll save that for later", I thought.

The gravel road went up, then down.  This repeated for a while, although it was more up than down.  That was good, since I'd hoped to haul ass downhill to finish the ride.  It wasn't all gravel, since those ancient mountains still have plenty of rocks all over the place.

Yeah, I hit every rock I could.  I didn't have a modern bike, so I wanted the "full experience."  It wasn't too much of a difference on the climbs since I have a rigid single speed I ride out there.  Well, maybe there was a small difference...

My "modern" bike weighs nineteen pounds as opposed to this almost fifty pound beast.  Shit.  I was hurting after only a few miles in.  It was hot, but since I was born and raised in Florida I was able to deal with it.  I took lots of breaks like I did back in the day.  Mostly that involved standing around shirtless while I sweated to death.

Uwharrie was my first mountain love here in NC, and Middle Ring Cycles was my first team.  I wore that shirt because those old timers didn't wear no goddamn cycling jerseys.

After (mostly) climbing in the hot sun on a heavy as shit old ass bike, I made it to a campsite I'd seen before out there.

On previous rides, that was as far as I'd been.  I haz a map though, and after looking at it (shirtless on the side of the road again) I decided to keep going.  I had no particular destination in mind, but the map showed the road going on for a long while.  It didn't seem that way once I got further along.

The road less traveled.

I kept going, and I didn't really mind the gradual climbing.  The road started out slightly overgrown, and after a few miles it turned into this:

You could barely see any sign of a road, but it was there.  I rode through that shit for a while, until I came to my senses.  Trudging along in the thick brush was a challenge but not very fun.  After a while I made the decision to turn around to check out a turn off I'd seen a few miles back.  The road cleared up again (a sign of usage I guess), and after a little climbing I started going downhill.  Instead of enjoying it completely I stopped to take a picture (and another break.)

I hopped back on and started screaming downhill.  The road started disappearing again and I heard rushing water.  I was at another sort of dead end, so I climbed my way back out and decided to make my way back to the main road.  And there was another short climb of course...

After that, I started screaming downhill.  I guess I was finally "Klunkin'."  Except that I was scared shitless (in a good way.)  With nothing but a shitty coaster brake and my feet, I had a difficult time controlling my speed.  I had lots of "Oh shit" moments, but I was having such a fun time that I didn't care.  I was hauling ass, thinking that bike would break apart at any moment.  It was the scariest, yet most fun feeling I've had on a bike in a long, long time.

Hell, I even saw Bigfoot out there.

Not the Uwharrie Bigfoot though.  The one from DeFeet.  Duh.

Before I knew it, I was screaming towards the parking lot.  I nearly crashed into the shitter out there and that made me laugh.  In fact, I was smiling the whole time I was out there (three hours for those of you keeping score at home.)  Sure, I suffered on the climbs and felt super unsafe on the downhills, but that piece of shit bike held its own out there and showed me a fun time.  That was my main reason for building it and now I'm glad I did.

And now I wonder why I waited so long to do some stupid shit like this.

No more excuses.  I'll ride whatever I feel like riding whenever I feel like riding it.  It's all in the name of fun, you know...

And keeping a promise to a friend that would've laughed his ass off at this crazy shit.

Klunkin' As Promised

Wow, it looks like I'm getting back to sorta regular blogging.  Maybe.

So last week I had good intentions (and was pretty busy), but when I finally got ready to post something I just couldn't.  You see, we (our cycling community) lost a great man last week to a tragic accident.  Jeff Archer, the proprietor of First Flight Bicycles and the Museum of Mountain Bike Art and Technology, lost his life to a drunk driver and I (like everyone else) was pretty broken up about it.  I didn't get all the way up to Statesville to visit as much as I wanted, but that didn't mean that hanging out there wasn't one of my favorite things to do.

Photo cred: Jonathan F.

Jeff has done so much for the local bike community, and he's the primary reason that we have a trail system in Lake Norman State Park.  He was one of the most knowledgeable and helpful people I've ever met too.  

Which brings me to my ride over the weekend...

Quite some time ago, my in-laws gave me an old Schwinn that had been sitting in a barn.  Instead of restoring it, I decided to turn it into a Klunker.  I went to see Jeff at First Flight because of his extensive knowledge about old bikes, and he ended up providing a set of modern wheels to get the thing rolling again.  He actually did a lot more than provide wheels though.  Click here to read it again.

So I've told that story before, but I probably forgot to mention one part:

The day I picked up the wheels, we chatted a bit about how I planned to use the bike.  I told him that it would mainly be a pub crawl bike, but that I intended to one day take it on some long, downhill gravel roads "like the old timers did."  He laughed (I can still hear him), and said he couldn't wait to hear all about it.  I promised him that I would, and that I'd probably be back in there for more parts when I did.  Unfortunately, he never got a chance to hear all about it because I kept chickening out.

That changed on Sunday.  

There was a memorial service for Jeff that day and I wanted to go to pay my respects.  I woke up and decided that I didn't want to be sad about this anymore and instead I would do something I promised him I would do.  I grabbed my nearly sixty year old bike and headed over to our little mountains to the East.

  

With the goal of riding fast on the downhills, I had to go up first:

It was high noon and nearly one hundred degrees.  I was on a bike that weighed probably fifty pounds, had a ridiculously hard gear, and might even break under my weight.  I was in for a long day.  While it may seem like a dumb idea trying to ride that contraption "like the old timers did", I was keeping a promise I'd made a few years ago.

It still meant something to me, even though now it was probably too late. 

Tomorrow, part two.  You know, the actual riding part.

Cruisin’

Two days in a row of good weather over the weekend.  If I wasn’t on call for work, my ass would’ve been up in the hills somewhere.  Instead, I had to stay local for the entire weekend.  It was a good thing I did though because I had to work quite a bit.  It wasn’t all at once.  They got me here and there, including once when I put in about three and a half hours.  I considered doing a road ride with some friends (two different invites), but I just couldn’t make it. 

I needed to ride, and when I got back from one of those work trips I seriously thought about it.

That’s my Klunker in case you haven’t seen it before (but I'm sure you have.)  I brought it out with the intention of just riding around the neighborhood for a little bit.  When I mentioned it to the little lady, the next thing I knew she had hers out and said, “Let’s go!”

So we went…

We started out riding in the neighborhood, but that quickly turned into the next neighborhood.  She wanted to show me something.

”Have you seen the giraffes?”

“Um, no.”

So we went around the corner, and lo and behold there were giraffes in someone’s front yard.

And other animals…

Weird.  Maybe they are circus freaks or something.  That little ride made my day but we weren’t done.  On through the neighborhoods…

We spun around quite a bit, and after I thought I’d had a good enough ride I started us home.  Once again, the little lady had other plans.

“Aren’t we going for ice cream?”

“Well, sure!”

So we did.

It wasn’t an epic ride.  We weren’t in the mountains, crushing someone’s KOM, or staying in Zone 3 for interval training.  None of that matters.  Or like I usually say, “Who gives a shit.” 

It was a bike ride.  And it was fun.  Kinda like when I was a kid. 

When is the last time you rode a bike just for fun?

I Need An Adventure

I really needed to get on a bike.  Any bike.  Being busy from work and plum wore out from lack of sleep, heading to the hills was out of the question.  Actually heading to any trail was out of the question.  I was dragging ass too much to take the road bike out (and no one in their right mind would ride one of those for fun anyway.)  I decided to take my Klunker out for a little urban ride.

I headed out of my neighborhood with no particular destination in mind.  I thought about heading up to the store to grab some beer, but instead I cut through the woods near my house and found a seldom used trail

This is a “hiking” trail through the woods behind my neighborhood, and I’ve ridden it a few times before.  It was the first time that old bike had actually been off road, so it was good enough.  It was a lot more fun than I expected, but that trail is so short that I didn’t want to stop there.  I kept riding, ending up near the local shopping center.  I didn’t get beer, but I had fun.  And, I managed to find some more “off-road” stuff.

Eventually I returned home, satisfied that I at least pedaled a little bit.  It was still a fun ride, and quite satisfying considering how tired I was.  The next (obvious) step is to take that piece of shit on a real trail, so look for that in the future.  In the meantime, I really need to get out on a real ride.  I can only take so much of this riding around the neighborhood shit.

This weekend, there are plans.  The hills may or may not be involved.  Hopefully that means I’ll have better stories for this piece of shit blog, but who knows.

Tune in tomorrow for Fun Friday and maybe I’ll get into that.

Just Like The Old Days

It's taken me quite a while, but my Klunker is finally finished.  Taking a 50+ year old bike frame and adding newer parts to it has been a challenge, but a fun one.  I didn't expect it to be beautiful, but neither did those guys in that video when they built theirs.

Just because you pour syrup on shit doesn't make it pancakes.

Anyway, here it is:

Not bad, I guess.  BMX style handlebars (courtesy of  The Hub), updated wheels ( from First Flight Bikes), and some real mountain bike tires (thanks to Maxxis.)  I had to order a new seatpost because the one I thought would work didn't, so I went with one of those aftermarket layback ones. I even found a new seat, which is plenty comfortable and wide enough to hold the biggest ass (like me.)  

It actually rides better than it looks, which is to say that it's pretty damn awesome.

Photo cred:  Little Miss Sunshine

It's primarily a pub crawl bike, but yes, I will take it on a trail.  Probably not anything in Pisgah, because I'm not that dumb.  Something local for sure. It will be nice to ride a trail like our mountain biking forefathers, and I'm really looking forward to it.  It's been a long journey to make this piece of shit rideable after finding it in a barn on my in-laws' farm.  I had to modify a few things, squeeze together a few parts that didn't want to know each other in such a way, and search the Internets and bike shops high and low to find shit that would get this thing rolling.

Sure, I could've purchased a new cruiser bike for what I put into this one, but where the hell is the fun in that?  This bike has character, albeit a dirty, grimy, rusty, hippy one.

Perhaps the maiden trail voyage will be tonight after I get out of work.

Maybe.  I'm still not convinced that it's safe.  I know, that didn't stop the Marin County boys.

Klunker ride report soon.

Housekeeping

Yesterday was supposed to be another social ride, and of course I was looking forward to it. As usual though, shitty weather prevailed and we didn’t get to do it.


This just in: rain sucks.

Anyway, since I had a ton of free time I figured I would get out in the garage and rearrange my bike stuff. I’ve been so busy lately that it looks like a tornado went through there, and it pissed me off every time I walked out there. So, I grabbed a beer and got to work.

I’m saving those cans in the background for a project. You’ll see one day, maybe.


There was shit everywhere. Well, not literally shit, but you know what I mean. The first thing I found was a cooler left over from our heckling at the Winter Short Track races, and it had a nice little surprise inside.

It was still cold, surprisingly.


After the cooler was emptied and the beer was put in the fridge, I pulled all the bikes out to sweep the floor. I put them back in one by one, after working on most of them. There were little nagging issues on each one that I’d been putting off, and it felt nice to get that out of the way. Eventually I got all thirteen bikes (yes, thirteen) back in there and moved on to other stuff.

Yes, I can count. And no, I couldn’t fit all of them in the photo. They’re not all mine, you know. There are three of us that ride, but the majority of them are mine. One bike in particular isn’t actually complete, but it’s getting close.

Thanks to Sam from The Hub for getting me a chain for that old beast. I’m still trying to find a seatpost clamp (I thought I had one), which would pretty much make it complete and ready to ride. At least I’ve been able to add some accessories though.

I know, this is some real exciting shit. Cleaning my bike area and doing random repairs does not a good blog make, but it’s probably better than me talking about playing the guitar the rest of the day.


That was exciting for me, but probably not so much for you. Here’s hoping I get to ride again soon.



For your sake and mine.

Fun Friday

I’m gonna head to the mountains and get rad this weekend.

Another Fun Friday is here.  A few pictures, and even fewer words.  Of course I’m gonna share some stuff that Lunchbox sent me that’s weird and maybe even funny.

We know why you get on the Internets.

Too much?  Sorry.  I’m such a dick.

Go do something useful with your life instead of wasting time here on a Friday.

I’m off to the hills to ride my bike and drink some beer.

Back To The Basics

Yesterday I told y’all I was building another bike. It shouldn’t be a surprise, since I mentioned it before. In case you forgot, I’m building my very own Klunker, so I can be just like those guys from that movie.

Oops. Not that one, this one:

I also told y’all I had to order new wheels for it. Mostly it was because it would cost too much to repair the old ones, but also because those old Schwinn wheels don’t accept modern-day mountain bike tires. The wheels came in a while ago (I talked about it already, try to keep up), and after a delay due to the snowy weather we had my tires did too. So, thanks to Maxxis and First Flight Bikes I’ve started putting together my new (old) bike.

Since it will be kinda like they did in the olden days (I like saying “olden”), I’m not gonna bother to paint it. The paint isn’t really that bad, so I’ve just cleaned it up a little (with some ProGold Degreaser Wash.) Most of the stuff on that bike was just grime from being in a barn for all those years, and it comes off with a little work. The cranks look almost new.

I got a seat, seatpost, pedals, and a new chain, but I haven’t had a chance to get everything assembled. Eventually the plan is to get some new handlebars, but with the stuff I have now I can ride it as soon as I put it all together. I can’t wait.


Maybe I should race that thing in Pisgah soon. I won’t die, right? Those old guys rode rad stuff on their old bikes, and they lived to tell about it. Maybe that’s because they were high as shit though.


Damn smokin’ the hippy trees.



I’m out.

Bikes Are The Best

Remember my little project? If you’re too lazy to click on the link, I’ll remind you that I’ve been working on building my very own Klunker from a very old Schwinn bike that I found in a barn. I ordered some new wheels for it, and headed up to First Flight Bikes on Saturday to pick them up.


I know I’ve mentioned it before (I tend to repeat myself a lot), but First Flight is home to the Museum of Mountain Bike Art and Technology, which houses a huge collection of all kinds of old bikes. You’re free to walk around and take it all in on your own, just be sure you don’t get sticky fingers and actually take something.

Anyway, I did wander around, and somehow ended up near the bathroom. Inside I found some cool shit (not literally, you sicko.) I saw some old advertisements from Schwinn hanging on the wall, one of which featuring the very same bike I just bought wheels for.

Back in the olden days this was a lot of money.


Since the wheels are newer, and the bike is uh, older, I was informed that I may have to do some modifications. The front hub was a little too wide to fit in the fork in its current configuration, and the rear hub wasn’t wide enough. That was an easy fix, so Jeff sent me down in the basement to dig through an old parts bin to find what I needed.


I didn’t even know they had a basement.

It was cold and dark down there, but luckily it didn’t take me long to find the nuts that I needed.

Even though I forgot the beer this time, I still got to hang around and shot the shit about old bikes and whatnot. I got some ideas on how I’ll make this old Klunker come to life, and I left outta there pretty excited. Jeff is always happy to share his knowledge about bikes and for that I am grateful. I said goodbye, packed up my shit, and headed back to the house to get busy on my project. I swapped the nuts around on the wheels, and immediately ran into another issue…


The axle on the old front wheel was a smaller diameter than the new wheel. I was warned that this might be the case, so I got out my tools to make that sumbitch fit.

A few minutes with the Dremel and I was ready to install the front wheel. It fit like a glove of course. The rear wheel was even easier, since I didn’t have to modify the frame.

Now I just have to order some Maxxis tires for it, find a seat (and seatpost) somewhere, and put everything together. I’ll be just like the guys in Klunkerz.

So rad.


I’ll be back tomorrow if I’m not snowed in. You know, because another round of winter weather is headed our way.

Not rad.

Blank

Some days when I sit here to write (or type, whatever), my mind draws a blank.  If I stare at the screen long enough, I can usually come up with something.  Today took longer than usual though.  When you write a blog that’s supposed to be about riding bicycles and you don’t get to ride your bicycle, I guess it makes sense. 

It’s been over a week since I’ve ridden.  I had high hopes to ride last Saturday, but it starting raining again (which closes everything here locally.)  I briefly though about Uwharrie, but after looking at the radar I saw that the worst was yet to come.  I decided to run a few errands instead.

Just in time for the shit storm.

Oh look.  Rain.  We sure need some of that around here.

I was heading up to my local shop to see if he could help me with some parts for a project.  Before I say anything else, I’ll show you what I mean.

This is a 1950’s era Schwinn Typhoon.  I picked it up last year when the little lady and I went to Buffalo to see her parents. It had been sitting in the barn for decades, and surprisingly was in decent shape.  Sure, it had some rust on it, but the internal stuff seemed pretty good.

It was missing a seat and seatpost, and the wheels need a ton of TLC.  Rather than tear apart, sandblast, repaint, and rebuild the wheels, I was hoping that I could find some replacement wheels.  The plan is to have my very own Klunker, which may see a little local trail time.  I’m sure it will be used mostly as a pub crawl bike though.

Let me be clear.  I don’t want to restore this thing back to it’s “like new” state.  I’m just gonna get it rolling again, and right now the wheels are the big hold up.  Even if I did restore the wheels, my tire choices are limited.  The rims are a weird size, and they only take one type of tire (unfortunately not a knobby one either.)  It was brought up that I could lace the old hubs to new rims, but I’m not sure it that would be worth it.  New wheels might be cheaper.

My shop couldn’t help me that day.  I knew it was a long shot, but we checked with his distributors and couldn’t find anything with such a narrow hub profile.  I guess my next step is to pay a visit to First Flight Bicycles, since they are known for their vast collection of vintage mountain bikes.

How the hell did those guys back in the day do this shit without The Internets and lots of bike shops to choose from?